It’s strangely comforting and I judge myself less harshly.”

“When I come to the club and see others experiencing grief, I feel I’m not alone. 'As both my children are in Australia, and couldn’t even attend his funeral due to travel restrictions, there was a lot of pent-up hurt and sadness, which was impacting my health. “I was very disturbed after my husband’s death last May,” shares one crying club member, 63, who requested anonymity. This often leads to an unhealthy build-up of negative feelings, triggering further stress and anxiety. The club’s 100-odd members say the congregation provides them with a valuable outlet for their grief because, for many adults, crying at home isn’t an option for fear of hurting their loved ones. Healthy Crying Club founder Kamlesh Masalawala often kickstarts the session by channelling and expressing his grief, to make others comfortable enough to follow suit. When you experience pain deeply, you’re also able to feel happiness with the same intensity, leading to a fuller life,” he explains. When sorrow, misery and pain overwhelm you, “tears emerge naturally as a response stimulated by anxiety. “When laughter can be shared, why not grief?” says Masalawala. One Sunday a month, men and women flock to the Healthy Crying Club for a collective and cathartic sobfest.

Laughter therapist Kamlesh Masalawala was so convinced of the healing power of tears that he launched India’s first crying club in 2017 in Surat. “They come back reporting more mental peace followed by a gradual return to normalcy after they’ve purged themselves through bouts of crying,” she says. Grief counsellor Mini Makhija says she advises her patients to “never hold back from crying” whenever they feel overwhelmed. In other words, one is literally purged of distress as one cries. Emotional tears also have higher levels of stress hormones in them, according to the American Academy of Ophthalmology. Withholding tears, on the other hand, can trigger stress, and lead to anxiety build-up, blood pressure and muscle tightening.īiologically, crying releases cortisol and creates feel-good endorphins, which are also known as the body’s natural painkillers. Doing so in a social setting can facilitate bonding and promote feelings of kinship or sorority. 'While women find it relatively easier to express themselves through tears, boys and men are socially conditioned not to, even though this can reduce negative health behaviours and help them have fuller lives.'Ĭrying, she says, is a valuable “safety valve” and can bring mental health benefits. “Many people associate crying during grief with depression, when it can actually be a sign of healing,” says clinical psychologist Sakshi Gupta. If talking about your circumstances helps, find empathetic people who will listen to you. Claudia Wolff / UnsplashĪs challenging as it may be, psychologists advise that the best way to handle sadness and grief is to embrace them. After a month, she started feeling “lighter, brighter and ready to reclaim my life”.Įxperts recommend setting up a 'crying nook' in an undisturbed part of your home, where you can release pent-up grief every time you feel overwhelmed. But when I saw my family affected by my state, I forced myself to express myself and share with them how sad I was feeling, reminiscing about good times with my brother and crying whenever I couldn’t hold back the tears,” says Mehra. EFT is based on the premise that emotions are key to identity, and required the mother-of-two to share her feelings as much as she could with her family or write them down.

Her worried family consulted a psychiatrist who put Mehra on a two-week “emotion-focused therapy” course. She grieved her sibling’s death, but gradually found herself withdrawing into a cocoon, unable to shed tears over the tragedy. Ruma Mehra, 38, was devastated after the death of her twin brother from Covid-19 last May.

Outlet for pent up sadness